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It’s Not Just About Sex

If you really love me, then you should give it to me to prove to me”.

“I won’t ever leave you, if you will prove to me that you love me…and that is by giving IT to me.”

Okay so I’m probably a little bit vague with all these, but I know some could get what I’m trying to point out here. When I was younger, in my teen years, this was the most popular dialogue that I hear when a guy wants his girlfriend’s virginity, when in reality, he just want sex.

Sex is not the basis of love, it is not a tool to measure how deep the person’s love towards someone, and if you love someone, you should not use this for proof or anything, if she couldn’t give it to you, because she want to reserve it on her wedding day, or if she believe in a “No sex before wedding” belief then respect that, and you are lucky because she has that belief.

If I’m given the chance to go back in time, when I have said that I won’t have sex until I’m married, I would strive to attain that. (Would you believe that I even said to myself before? That I am not going to get pregnant because it’s too painful and that I would only adopt? Well that was me when I was in grade school, and now here I am, just finished cradling and putting my son to sleep)

I am not saying that sex is not important when it comes to relationship because it’s another thing that makes a relationship healthy, if you share the same heat. It is essential, but it’s never a basis of love, it just spice up the relationship of a couple, adding up the ardent love towards each other. It’s not just about sex, because what if your girl doesn’t want to do it? What are you gonna do? Leave her because she can’t do it? So that means you didn’t get into that relationship because you love her, but because you only want sex, then I guess you should probably find someone else.

If you want your relationship to last, take your relationship up to how many years, then you should know how to communicate, communication is a very important key, but with understanding too, if you two for example are in a fuss, and you try to reach out to your partner and he did too, then you should understand each other’s concern, it’s not important if who’s right and who’s wrong.

Because at the end of the day it is better to lose the fight than to lose the person you love.

And having a make-up sex after a fight is actually the best. Just kidding!

However, not only those things are important, there’s honesty and fidelity. And respect.

Going back anyway, I remember when I was in high school, I was asked the same. Do I love him? Yes (well I did) then I have to prove it to him, and give IT to him, NO. I don’t have to. I was so young then, I didn’t know anything about it, I was still untouched that time, plus, I’m not to get pregnant, I was about to adopt… That’s what I promised myself then. Now I realized that that guy doesn’t really want me. He just wanted a piece of me, that I am so thankful today, that I didn’t give IT to him, because after a month after asking me that, he left. (So much for sincerity)

Until today, I could still hear some of those statements, and it vexes me, it’s not something you should ask to a woman, it’s in the willingness, and not like pressuring your lady that if she truly loves you then she should give herself to you. And if it’s really love that is the center of your relationship, time will make it happened.

Young ladies of this days, never compromise, be wise, I am not an expert to tell you all these, but by my experiences I learned a lot. And take it from here, never risk something you’re going to regret someday, take care of yourself, and love yourself, because if you won’t, who will?

Always remember, if that person you are with right now asked you to prove your love to him by giving yourself to him, tell him that sex is never a basis of love.

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